Your oldest friend

[ctrl-s]

Not the oldest person you're friends with, and not necessarily your best or closest friend, but the person you've been friends with the longest that you're still friends with.

Over 25 years ASH and I have

attended the same college as undergraduates
had several good friends in common
seen countless shows, movies, and other art together
turned each other on to quantities of great music, writing, movies, and visual art
tolerated each other's aesthetic blind spots (J-pop: WTF?)
threatened to swerve car all over 94 if other did not respect driver's favored band
been to NY, LDN, 'Dam, Prague, Venice, Aix-en-Provence, and Paris together
gotten drunk and/or stoned together
tolerated each other's horrible relationships
encouraged each other's non-horrible relationships
dated the same guy (not at the same time) and it worked out fine
made many evil jokes at each other's expense
made many evil jokes at other people's expense
offered beatdowns to people who fucked with the other
encouraged each other's creative endeavors
quoted each other's Wit and Wisdom
celebrated many birthdays
anti-celebrated several Christmases
helped each other out (OK, she helped me) with $ and a place to stay (thanks)
never had a really nasty fight (only one real argument that I recall)
fallen out of touch for years at a time (my fault) and resumed friendship easily

Salut, Andrea!

[iembalm]

Is it pathetic and sad for me to state on an internet forum that I actually have no friends?

[ctrl-s]

No. Anyway I don't necessarily believe you. You sound pretty cool.

[goosman]

I don't believe iembalm either, way too cool of a poster to be friendless.

I've been friends with EMC for a bit over 30 years, we played on the same youth soccer team as 6 or 7 year olds. He and I live far apart now, but we chat often online. We went to part of grade school together, and then jr. high, but he moved to go to a prep school where his dad lived during our high school years. I sort of followed him to Ann Arbor where he ultimately dropped out of U of M, and now he's a Buddhist monk.

[joime]

a guy named Brendan, I see him every now and then.But I have known him since jeeze 9 or 10.Also my friend C-Bear known him bout the same.I am more in contact with C-bear.I have alot of friends from when I lived in Brewer,good friend that I have known for almost ten years.

[Mandroid2.0]

My friend Jessie and I met at a beer party for the brewing club our parents belonged to when we were probably both around 3-4 years old. She lived in Green Bay and I lived in Pulaski, so we didn't get to see each other all that often but we'd talk on the phone and send mail to one another.

A short list of things we were obsessed with:

He-Man
She-Ra
Jem
Barbies
Pop Rocks
Nerds candy
reading books
Pig Latin
tormenting her little brother
Moon Dreamers

Here is us pictured on one of my birthdays, as I receive Pop Rocks, Nerds sunglasses (the kind you filled with the candy) and my favourite Jem doll:


At one point, Jessie and I started a periodical about anthropomorphic Nerds and their daily happenings in an imaginary world. We would occasionally get one of our parents to make photocopies and try to sell them to people at a "news stand."

After she and I entered our teenage years, I started figure skating and we sort of lost touch. My life from about 13 to 18 was pretty much: school+skating+swim team.

I started my first year of college at the University of Wisconsin-Madison, and we received a list of phone numbers and email addresses for all of the people staying in the dorms. I got bored one evening and decided to read it front to back.

"HOLY SHIT! JESSIE IS HERE!"

I immediately called her up and we had dinner together for my birthday. It was like no time had passed since we were kids.

I think that we managed to get together a couple more times before Spring finals, and I transferred schools after that and we lost touch.

2001 and I'm living in Washington D.C. I haven't heard from Jessie since Madison but there's a thread that I started on the forums for this club in Green Bay where shows used to happen, and the thread is called "Out-nerd Me!" I bring up a couple of key instances from Jessie and my past friendship, like the Nerd zine.

I get a PM from her asking, "um...Amanda?" or some such thing.

Turns out she's gotten into punk/indie since we last met and we've probably attended the same dark, smokey shows for the past few years and had no idea. She's also going to school in D.C. We joke about unintentionally stalking one another.

We tried to hang out after that but 9/11 happened, all hell broke loose, I lost my job, I dropped out of art school, I was subletting my apartment and then I lived in the basement of The Dirtfarm in a tent for a month or so before I drove back to Wisconsin...

The Friendster/Myspace/Facebook age eventually reacquainted us with one another. She's now a chemistry professor in Flagstaff, AZ and if I can get my car fixed anytime before I leave California, I'm thinking we need to spend a week catching up. I'm sure that as always, it'll seem as though no time had passed and we'll get along perfectly and have almost identical interests.

Shit. I wouldn't be at all surprised if she reads this forum, actually...

[Justin from Queens]

John Hastie, who has posted on here from time to time, is my cousin and one of the closest people in the world to me. He has been an incredible influence to me and I've known him my whole life. That's 36 years.

Worst thing I can say about him is that he talks way too much shit about his band sometimes. And he liked that song "The Buffalo Stance" by Neneh Cherry. He could truthfully say much worse about me.

= Justin

PS - Actually, I just listened to that song for the first time in about 20 years. It's not terrible.

[ctrl-s]

Awwwwwwwwww.

I just listened to ["Buffalo Stance"] for the first time in about 20 years. It's not terrible.

I happen to love that song.

[Marsupialized]

My buddy Jeff, we been bros since before we was into hoes. Nawmasayin?

[ctrl-s]

My buddy Jeff, we been bros since before we was into hoes. Nawmasayin?

Sadly I no longer have any bros since before I was into hoes (so to speak). I have basically no contact with anybody I knew before I was 17 except for my mom.

[Steve V.]

My oldest friend is dead.

My second oldest friend is a blithering, thick-headed alcoholic who has crazy talent but would rather squander it on drink and stupidity than actually do something with his life. He's a flunkie and a fuck-up and he's content with it. Breaks my heart every single day that I hear he's been up to bullshit. I love him like a stepbrother.

He and I played "Sister Ray" for two hours one Halloween, past last call at a dive bar which we promptly emptied. The dude playing bass had to leave midway through for some reason so it was just us, absolutely drunk and laughing hysterically. Dead friends who were still alive in the audience with big grins on their faces that never gave way under zombie makeup and the weight of plastic vampire teeth. I think it was one of the peaks of my life.

I'm going to save this kid.

[kenoki]

Helen - we've been friends for 20 years. We were in the same class in 5th grade, locker buddies and lived a few houses down from each other. We were also both born in Germany, and had a military white dad and an asian mom. She was really into metal and I was really into Debbie Gibson, but we were both into Garfield. I think the last time we secretly played barbies was in 9th grade. We discovered a lot of stuff together... stay up late and watch Kids in the Hall in 91... dug through her cool metal brother's records (and secret stash of Playboys) when he wasn't home. There was an infamous night when Jessie Deifenbachen put his underwear on her face. She was on ritalin. Love Helen. Still calls me once a month drunken.

[Robert G]

My oldest friend would be a fellow from the West Side of Cleveland named Nick. I haven't seen or talked to him in years. Last time I checked he was going for Organic Chemistry at Case-Western Reserve University here in Cleveland. Pretty certain he would've graduated (crazy-smart nerd) and is currently in Grad School somewhere.

Second-oldest friend would be the first friend I made here in my suburb, Ben. We were two young nerdy kids, thinking about Aliens Vs. Predator scenarios, Z-BOTS, all that shit. Too bad his mom turned out to be a bitch and moved to Louisiana when we were in third grade. I was depressed for a good while in elementary school because of that crap. His dad, who still lives out here, and Ben would stop on by whenever Ben would visit Ohio. He hasn't done this in years though. I think the last time Ben stopped by, we realized we were in totally different worlds now.

I guess that makes Randy my current oldest friend. Met Randy originally when he started attending my elementary school. Funny dude, extremely good with the wit. Knows movies like no one's business and other stuff that makes him a pretty well-rounded fellow of the land. However, he has a terrible attitude when it comes to living. He's not on drugs, but he just has a serious case of ennui when it comes to bettering his life.

[John C5]

This soon-to-be-a-dad dude.

[andteater]

god, i hate hipsters.

andyk

[LBx]

i'm still great friends with most of the guys i went to grade, middle and high school with. we generally all lived only a few streets apart from one and other and went thru all that adolescent b.s. together and at once - organized sport, stolen booze, utter failure with the opposite sex, death, etc. - rockin' the 'burbs. totally solid, great guys. and if i do happen to run into the odd one friend who slipped out of the group a bit we pick up right where we left off. no problem.

not quite sure where the close to 30 years since the first day of school went though...

great friends for life: NC.

[turnbullac]

I met Zach when he shadowed me in first grade as a prospective student. Then he came back in secoind grade and since then we were instant best friends. Like scary best friends. We used to do all kinds of crazy shit and make each other laugh so hard. He had a tree house with a zip line. His family adopted a golden retreiver that used to hump anything that moved so they named it frisky. When we got a little older we used to make all kinds of hilarious videos with his parents' camera. My folks made me go to prep school in 7th grade and then his family had to move away to California in 8th grade. I remember running alongside their silver Mercedes as they were pulling out the driveway. That was really crushing to watch him go.

Anyway, almost 30 years later we still keep tabs on each other. We lived together for a while in New York after college when he got out of film school. Great guy, really one of the kindest people I have ever met in my life, but he has had some ups and downs with his relationships and is going through a divorce and he's actually thinking about giving up film making and going into the seminary.

[Sowley]

Oh that would be the mighty Bill Duffany... we met when we were maybe 12 or 13? Pro-wrestling dorks that hit it off instantly. From that point on (until I moved to Chicago) we: hung out nearly every day; logged a ton of miles in his car; made terrible jokes; saw a ton of shows together; played in bands, etc. I still talk to him regularly, and miss him terribly. The other night, I realized I forgot his birthday and called him at 5 in the morning with a long-winded sissy-merry message about how much I love and miss him, ending it with "I'm sure you'll save this message and play it later in front of our other friends to embarrass me." Well, he was visiting some mutual friends in New Hampshire that night, and sure enough he did just that. He still lives in Plattsburgh and is a High School Teacher in Lake Placid, NY. Easily the funniest dude I know.

Here's a picture from a wedding in Vermont. On the left is a whole 'nother story named Tom Glasgow.

[Redheadache]

Jennifer! We met in first grade. She was a tomboy and was super cool and her brother played metal records and drove a motorcycle. At my first grade birthday party she pinned Chris Gregg down and kissed him. My mom has the picture and still teases her about it.

We were not best friends but were solid friends throughout elementary school and then in middle school I went somewhere else. I came back in high school and we picked up where we left off. Tripped acid the first time together, drank Jack Daniels before school and got caught and then were pretty much grounded the entire year.

Skip to after college when I broke up with my ex-husband. I showed up at the house where she was living in St. Louis two days before my 25th birthday after breaking up with a fuckwad. I had a sleeping bag and two days worth of clothes. "We're goin to mardi gras." We spent five glorious days in New Orleans listening to music, getting our fortune read, tripping on acid and sleeping in our cars. We showered in Planet Hollywood's sinks (have you seen them? they're huge!) and slept in a bathtub at a party.

We both went to art school and have a similar sense of humor. She lives in New York now and has two kids which I've never met (wtf?). I talk to her occasionally. I love her and miss her.

[jalalabuddy]

My oldest friend is Toby, I met him when I was about 6 or 7 riding around on my BMX. I was kind of a lonely, shy kid and he was waiting at a bus stop near where I lived with his Dad, and he let me play with his model airplane. We started meeting there often and had all kinds of great adventures. His mum pretty much lived in the two pubs near my house through the next couple of years and we would go there and play table football, pac-land and pool. Those endless summer holidays were great, playing football (soccer, Americans) in the park all day long, building dens and skating badly. When we went to high school, after a year or so we kind of drifted apart, he hung around with some real jerks, he got into a lot of trouble and ended up in a young offenders instutute due to drugs and stealing, and developed a heroin addiction. He moved away and got clean and I hadn't seen him from when we were like, 13-14. Last year he said he was coming back and we hooked up and it was like we were never apart, and despite having no contact during those formative years we shared so many common interests in music and literature etc. He is way smarter than me though and went to Oxford after he got himself clean and did really well. He's moved back up there now so we don't have much contact again, but it's great to have friends that you can rarely see but just connect with when you do. I think it was Marsupialized that said something in another thread about needing people around you that are just pleased to see you when you see them after a while and don't give you grief over the time apart. It's so true. I just wished he played an instrument, would be great to be in a band with him.